I never did think it was such a bad little tree.......

Thursday, December 11, 2014
"I never did think it was such a bad little tree," said Linus in A Charlie Brown Christmas. One of my all time favs.

It's also word-for-word what I said when I put the finishing touches on my new Christmas tree.

Back in April or May, I picked this fella up off the side of the road. I was driving down my street when it caught my eye.....it's not every day you see a Christmas tree out in the spring, after all. Someone had put it out for big trash day and for the life of me, I can't figure out why.

I pulled over, threw it in the back of my truck, and stowed it away in the attic until Christmastime rolled around. I forgot about it, of course, until I got the decorations down this December. It was a wonderful surprise.

It may have been covered in two inches of dust and insulation, but underneath it was beautiful.

It just needed a little love.

And cleaning and ornaments.....

But to me, it was magical. One man's trash is another man's treasure, amirite?

With a wooden bark trunk, just pop an evergreen cube in the Scentsy and its almost like this baby is real. Almost. One day.

Some may say having three trees in a 1,500 square foot house is over kill. I pity these people. The more the merrier.

I'm the Christmas Queen, after all.

So deck the halls, spike your hot chocolate (I suggest buttershots), rock out to Christmas music, watch Christmas movies on repeat and fully embrace the season. It only comes once a year, you know. I fully intend to make a big deal out of it.

Merry Christmas, ya'll.

The Devil Car

Tuesday, December 9, 2014
Hiya, Chloe the Great Pyr, here.

My humans keep referring to me as the "Christmas Puppy" and I'm not real sure what that means. I think they are going crazy; they put a tree in the living room, right where I sleep! It's a good thing they found one without a bird nest inside.

But let's back up a little. I have a story to tell.

Have you ever been so scared you nearly pooped? I have. It was a snowy day filled with running and bacon (the best kind of day; I love visiting Grammy Pam). I was happy when it was time to get in the car because that meant we were going home. At home I can come inside and lay on the rug where it's warm.

I love car rides. Or, at least, I did. Until found out how scary they can be.

I was looking out the back window as we rode along when all of a sudden ..... SMACK. Then BANG, right by my face. I fell down, it was awful. It scared the poop out of me. I had to climb over the backseat and get to my humans ASAP so they could hold me and pet me and let me out of the devil car!

But then we just sat. And sat some more. All while being stuck in the devil car. They kept talking about the snow and ice and how slippery and cold it was but I wanted to get out and run home. I have a fur coat, after all. I wouldn't freeze.

Then....get this.....they picked me up and put me inside a HUGE, loud car with only one seat. I had to sit in their laps! It was terrifying. There was a stranger driving. They laughed at me, which made it worse. Luckily the stranger took us home and I got to sleep on the rug.
I think they called it a "tow truck." Terrifying.

I thought my human's learned their lesson after that, but a few days later they put me in a car just like the devil car! It was a different color, but I'm smarter than they think. I knew we were in harm's way, so I hopped over the backseat and stood between them on the arm rest. I tried to tell them it was dangerous, but they kept driving! So I kept standing. I was panting pretty loudly because it was so scary, I thought they would understand, but they didn't. They just laughed.

If they think I'm getting in a devil car again, they're crazy. They can't make me. I think I'd rather cross a bridge (and that's saying a lot!).

If you see my humans, please plead my case. I'd really appreciate it. You can also mention that I'd like scrambled eggs for breakfast on a regular basis and I'd also like more rugs in the house so I don't have to walk on the wood floor. Oh, and a puppy brother.

In the mean time, I'll be sleeping on the rug by the inside tree.

________________________________

Please note the wreck was not our fault and no one was hurt. Besides Chloe's mental state, of course. The car had seen better days (notice the wheels going two different directions....), so we got a new one out of the deal. With no hail damage and fewer miles! 

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